I hired a business coach. Then I did two years of therapy.

In 2023 I booked a call with a business coach. I thought I needed budgets, org charts, and a growth plan. What I actually needed was to sit with my own stuff. I spent the next two years doing therapy in a business context.

When I expanded from solo practice to a group, I knew how to do therapy and I knew how to run my own caseload. Building a company is different. It forced me to re-meet old patterns I thought I had already handled.

I kept telling myself, “I just need better tactics.” What moved the needle was working through the blocks under the tactics.

Why starting a business brings up everything

Starting a business is a creative act. It is also a mirror. It reflects how you relate to money, authority, visibility, and need. It tests your boundaries and your sense of worth. It asks you to sell your service and, as an owner, to sell yourself as a leader. That is not the same as being a strong clinician.

The blocks I had to face

• Money narratives. I came from nonprofits. Underpaid and over-delivering felt normal. Profit felt suspect. I had to define a moral, sustainable model so growth felt aligned with my values. 

• Authority. If you grew up with an authoritarian caregiver who was punitive, you may become either rigid or overly permissive. I had to learn firm, kind leadership and stick to it when it was uncomfortable.

• Visibility. Being the face of a practice is different from being a provider. I had to tolerate being seen, having opinions, and saying no.

• Boundaries with care. I love helping. But people pleasers do not make good leaders. Owners who cannot set boundaries burn out and take their team with them.

• Perfection and control. Teaching someone to do things exactly as you do can kill initiative. Good enough is often the right move.

• Self-trust. Strategy only works if you can hold steady long enough to let it work.

Tactics matter. Budgets, pricing, hiring, and marketing matter. They work better when your nervous system is not fighting them.

What changed when I did the inner work

• I priced according to value and could say the number without apologizing.

• I hired slower and led clearly.

• I marketed consistently because visibility no longer felt like a threat.

• I could make a profit without feeling like I was selling my soul.

If you are stuck, try this first

• Name the stuck point in one sentence.

• Ask, “What am I protecting myself from here?”

• Choose one action that proves the opposite belief for one week.

• Notice what your body does before, during, and after. Adjust the dose, not the goal.

If you keep buying playbooks and still feel stuck, it may not be a strategy problem. It may be a mindset and nervous system problem that therapy can solve.

If you want help working the inner pieces while you build the outer pieces, reach out. Start with a brief consultation. Therapy can help make the lasting change you need in order to reach your professional goals.